Are you one of those women who have been trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant month after month only to be disappointed? Do you feel like you are doing everything right – timing for conception, eating well and there’s no real explanation for why you’re not conceiving? Or you know there is a problem but fertility treatments aren’t succeeding?
It can be so frustrating as you watch each month pass and holding a wriggling baby in your arms seems to be getting further away instead of closer.
Through my work helping women increase their chances of getting pregnant, I have discovered that it’s so much more complex than just getting the sperm to meet the egg! Even when all the physical factors are in place, sometimes it just doesn’t work. If you have a fertility related diagnosis like Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, anovulation, High FSH and/or you’re over the age of 35 year it can make it even more challenging.
.Your mindset and beliefs play an important part in getting pregnant
Let’s see how they can help you.
Visualise the pregnancy and baby after birth:
I often ask my clients if they can picture their belly swelling month after month during pregnancy, can they picture themselves holding the baby they are trying so hard to conceive? If they can imagine their family unit (or just themselves if they are going solo on this journey) expanding and a cute little baby joining?
Why is being able to visualise this important?
You don’t start building a house without an architect’s plan, right? Whenever you want to achieve something, it helps to have a goal and to be able to really SEE it in your head before you even begin. Our minds are so powerful and when we are focussed on a goal without unconscious blocks (we’ll get to them in a moment) then our mind will help us get there. If you can’t even visualise that goal clearly, it may be showing their is some work to do to clear those unconscious blocks and help you achieve your goal.
What are you resisting?
You would be surprised how difficult visualising the above scenarios can be for many women and not surprisingly it may indicate there is some kind of resistance going on. We often say we want things when deep down we don’t really want it. We may not have even acknowledged this hidden feeling because we’re so invested in pursuing motherhood, our culture places so much importance on having several children and also due to our partner’s desire for a child.
I have had women in the middle of IVF cycles say that they are unsure they really want to get pregnant. Why would someone go to such lengths if she didn’t really want to have a baby?
Some common blocks:
After discussing this with dozens of women here are some common blocks that might be blocking YOU from conceiving, too:
- You’re scared you won’t be a good mother (very common if you had a challenging childhood)
- You’re worried about the challenges of combining motherhood and a career
- You’re concerned how her body may change during a pregnancy
- You’re worried how their relationship with a partner may change once a child joins the family
- You’re worried about the actual birth and how they will cope
Each woman has her own reasons and whatever your reason may be, it’s your legitimate reason. The question then becomes how to deal with it.
I like to use EFT Tapping, a simple technique that is sometimes described as psychological acupuncture. Using light tapping on points on your face and upper body, we can help uncover what these blocks might be, help you overcome them and move on to successfully conceiving your baby.
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